Daily Snippet: Spoons well spent

Today I've spent tackling the garden. It's got 10 yrs worth of overgrowth and has been doing whatever the hell it likes for a long time now. I made a promise I would sort it out and I've been cutting, clearing and replanting for over a year now. 

2013

2014
Planted some potatoes along the side. Found a chair!

Today: Before!

Today: After!

It had only recently occurred to me to take Before and After pics. But I can honestly say that was Spoons well spent.

Viennetta in the Bath you say? Cor Decadence! 

(apologies if this shows up twice I tried to post using the app but it's crapp!)

Daily snippet: Voyeurism

According to Blogger I have 1200 page views since I started up last year! 

Yay thanks for the visiting folks!

Yet, I've only had about 5 new subs/tweeters/likers in that time.

Such is the nature of the Internet. And blogging for that matter. Putting personal and private thoughts words out into the void of the Web and the only reciprocation is the knowledge you have been "viewed". 

#SharingSaturday

I would like to thank all the visitors to my page for your support. Even though most of you don't hit that G+ button coz like what does that thing even do?! I re-read that and giggled too... yeah hit my G+ button... hmm. Google did you even notice that? 

Today's post is all about sharing. You guys can keep your #throwbackThursday I wanna start #SharingSaturday. 

This is why:



We've all had one of those days, weeks, months or some of us have even been trapped in our own prisons for years impossible to break free.

It's kinda like you're in a room full of people and you're getting smaller and smaller and quieter and quieter but everyone else is staying the same. Even those in your support network often seem as though they're hard to find in that crowded room. They're trying to find you, oh most assuredly, but you keep making yourself smaller and smaller because the room is just too much. Support only works if you reach out too. I believe this project will help those of us who feel bound by our emotions, trapped in our disabilities and conditions and give us hope and a forever expansive support network. The more people you have in that room to help you, the easier it is for you to find them.

I am a great believer in sending snail mail to people. I have a penpal I have been writing to for over 15 years. You take so much more care in writing letters than you do emails, texts and tweets and it much more satisfying receiving letters that you know someone has taken care to write to you!

I'm well jealous I didn't think of this myself, considering I keep trying to get my friends to write me letters haha.

Link to Support One Million Lovely Letters

Nalabox In Complicated Relationship with: Tomb Raider (2013)

Bet y'all thought I'd say I hate it right? Well, I do.

And I sort of don't.

Me and Lara have had such a turbulent partnership from the outset even before I started to truly play the game. She was to be my first YouTube video upload! But it was not meant to be. My PC, the program I was using and my internet connection was against us from the start. But first impressions aren't always to be taken as they are. You must always give people the benefit of the doubt. I'm nice like that. I played the intro of this game repeatedly for 2 weeks until I got it to work. I was already sick of that damn beach, but I wasn't going to let it stop gaining any positive experience of the game, that was just outside factors preventing us from being together.

One of my many distractions. Val @ 3months Old.

I've never played a Tomb Raider game before and thought this would be a good place to start chronologically. Sense made?  

You all saw my moments of joy and rapid escalation into rage at certain points. We all know this game is broken, those gods damn quick-time-only-work-within-certain-pixels-events were a joke. That creepy way she would appear on puppet strings would pull me out of the immersion that we were experiencing that island together. Was that the intention of the game makers? To make us feel like, we are not only witnessing the transformation into the Lara that you all know and love, but that we are experiencing it alongside with her or we are her? I have no idea. Oh boy did I experience that place. It was a very emotionally involving game but not for the game play but the bloody frustration just getting past those glitchy-as-fuck-events. Again, that's not the game really is it? that's the design of the thing messing with me, yes it's a factor as part of any review but it still didn't deter me from playing the game. You guys know I've uninstalled games quicker for a lot less shit happening. It also wasn't realistic for a Survival game either as discussed in a previous blog post clicky here clicky. Yet I still wanted to play it.

I love Lara but I can't stand Lara.

There is a duality to this game. There are in fact two Lara Croft's.

Gameplay Lara and Cut-scene Lara.

If you focus on only one of them you in fact are playing a completely different game. You are presented with a completely different character. It all starts after Cut-scene Lara kills that nameless shouty man. That rapey man. That's the moment when Lara's whole psychology separates to a one where she takes that experience and internalises it and a one where she takes that experience and intensifies it. 

Gameplay Lara is competent and adaptive to her environment. She, or maybe it was me driving the character, is capable of smart survival.The only thing that holds her back is the progress of skills that get unlocked during the game, which I found to be too late to when you would actually need them. Melee weapon. First thing any character in any game is capable of wielding. She had the climbing pick attached to her leg the entire game but couldn't use it to defend herself, she could only dodge but not actually puncture anyone with it or climb certain walls until after certain events that Cut-Scene Lara had to overcome. But she was seemingly perfectly proficient in such skills BEFORE Cut-scene Lara had to learn it. This Lara's character development has been the most engaging and the most complete, in my own honest opinion, that would lead to the persona of the previous games' Lara Croft.

Cut-scene Lara is the portrayal of Lara that upset a lot of people, not only the fans of the previous games but also those who get upset about the portrayal of women in videogames. This Lara is a frilly dress short of the princess in the castle but she's no longer the physically unrealistic woman. I cannot compare this Lara to either of those things as I don't have experience with the previous games and I only learned of the feminist outrage after I played the game for a few hours. We were told this would be a different Lara and that they made her more gritty and believable but this Lara, again in my honest opinion, hasn't developed enough, well she has. but not anywhere near the persona of the Lara Croft's that came before her. She's the alternative reality Lara, who didn't really save herself in the end, I feel like *I* was the one to save her. Our experience of that island was not a shared one, but a one in which I had to drag her skinny little ass up that damn mountain so Gameplay Lara could take care of bidness. 

I did feel like Cut-scene Lara was the person and Gameplay Lara was the split personality. You'd think it would be the other way around apart from as you get near the end of the game some aspects of Gameplay Lara have finally been accepted by Cut-scene Lara and that's when we see actual character development on her part. You can't repress parts of yourself that only causes internal conflict so once she became self aware, competent and we finally had enough XP to buy the skills we should have had hours ago, that Gameplay Lara was clearly capable of, she was no longer a burden for me to trudge along with just to finish the game but the strong independent stereotype-shoving woman they promised us!

Or did she just become the "man" and saved her own Princess? As pointed out here

We've all had a game like that. You go past caring and blank out the glitches and the plot holes and the impossible gameplay just to finish the damn thing and never play it again.

Well I did finish it. I actually finished it months after I was still bringing out videos for it. My PC messed up and I had to play through it AGAIN to catch up to where the videos left off (I lost my footage). Slightly cheaty of me, but that rage and frustration for the River sequence and Mountain village buildings falling down was all real. Extra real because I knew I had to do it again, and again because I'd have to do them again if I wanted to bring out more vids. After my last vid "Glasgae Kiss" an update meant I lost that particular save for some reason and I nearly lost my reason. So I finished the game proper, off camera as it were. It's kinda killed my desire to post videos. Hence the hiatus. You can't enjoy doing the YouTube thing if you don't enjoy the game you're playing. I couldn't face that damn beach again.

I don't know what really to say about those views who say She's a worse portrayal of women in videogames, than her predecessors, because it's a pretty dire situation she's in and yes the element of the princess was there but who could say they would have done any better if put in that same situation? Did she turn into a man as most of the strong male characters were killed off or were bad guys? I don't think saying that is accurate really. She didn't "become the man of the story" as each Gender is capable of expressing characteristics of masculinity and femininity, you don't just switch from one to the other but rather maintain a balance. (society likes to tell you otherwise but that's a whole different debate). In some situations it's more applicable to assume one of those roles in order to respond to it. Maybe the game makers intention was to present a Lara that could balance these aspects but forced us to watch her struggle to get to that point. We all experience every emotion. Regardless of what sex you are. 

Lara, in the end, was just a human being that had a lot of bad shit happen to her and she had to respond to it or die. 

I don't think I would have made it past that first guy in the cave on that damn beach.

Stage 5 Complete!

I've listened to all of the suggestions of the Best Musical Score in a Game Evah like hew!

Number 5:

Megaman X (Youtube playlist)

I have to admit this is the only one I didn't listen to all the way through having listened to Megaman 2 about 1 hour beforehand. I felt like I'd heard it before and I have no idea which game came first. It's placing 5 out of the 13 Soundtracks I was given by fellow Gamers because it's too damn busy! Seems like Megaman never gets a rest in this game judging from the music he's gotta be on the go all the damn time, totally heart pumping action GO GO GO! No time for reflection and whether he's doing the right thing. I never had a Nintendo growing up, so when I listen to this I think Sonic... Which blue speed freak guy came first?

Numba 4: 

Quake (That NiN sound man) 

Being a fan of that guy and never played the game I enjoyed this as purely an extension of his discography. I have no idea about the impact the music itself has on the game play (comparing everything to Mass Effect 3 here by the way). If it's to tell me that Quake is a very futuristic, gritty and despairing world. OMG how much despair and misery must be in this game? Then it does its job perfectly well. I know there is no hope in saving the princess in this game. It feels like she's been flayed for several days before I got it in my head to go to the dark palace and rescue her, only to find my own death waiting for me in the form of the physical manifestation of her last thoughts on whichever planet she came from. *shivers* 

Number Three:

Populous: The Beginning (Just a few tracks)

This was a much needed relief after listening to most of the Halo soundtrack someone suggested, which was weirdly techno and chipper considering the premise of the game. Anyway, Populous pipe music was relaxing with a sense of foreboding but a not-too-serious vibe of: is there going to be a natural disaster or just a wet fart? I'll go to the toilet just in case sense of foreboding.

Numberererer 2:

Quake 2 ( my bad?)   

I know a bunch of you will be all like "But Trent waah wahh herpa derpa!" hear me out. As drenched in the 'popular music sound' as this was it wasn't as depressing. I'm going purely off what the music tells me about the game, I have no idea what the Quake series is about, I'm most likely going to Google them after this here little experiment. This soundtrack told me that even in spite of the shit hitting the fan, that shit is being taken care of! We have a good chance of saving that princess, we are in control! Hope in Humanity will win over all! Yay!

However, there is a high chance we still didn't save the princess because we were too busy pretending we were 15 again and dying our hair black and only playing at the "big boy trousers" coz man when we get to her she's badly mutilated, alive, but we just couldn't quite get all our shit together and that manifestation follows us back to the King as we hand over the husk that is his daughter. We walk away with heavy pockets and even heavier hearts as we hear two shots out of that old man's revolver and we daren't look back coz that sum bitch manifestation looks an awful lot like Mr Reznor and that Number 4 scenario looks at lot nicer from here, but it's not number two coz we're still alive right? Right?!  

Honourable mention before Number 1:

The Bioshock series soundtracks, very enjoyable and not as repetitive as Fallout 3

Stage 1:

You should already know if you read my previous blog post....

Streets of Rage 2 

As soon as Mr KB suggested this my heart was like "Holy shit YES" 

Everything you need to know about a game is in it's music I'm sure of it. This game is serious and witty, and fast paced with a little romance. It has Heart! Reflection and Action! Each track as listed when you hear it you know exactly where you are in the city and what's about to go down. You feel like you've been kicked in the teeth along with Adam, Axel and Blaze but you stand right back up again so sure you're gonna beat every 80's Villain ever with your amazing hair!

Game music:

Can be incredibly misleading. Same with everything else used in advertising in every product ever. But imagine if we bought games just from listening or viewing one particular aspect of it? I say this because I think recently we as consumers are expected to fork out a lot of money on something that publishers think looks good but is just that: an aesthetically pleasing but pay-full-price-for-an-unfinished-product! What I'm saying is most of my assumptions based on just listening to the music of the game may be completely wrong and that's how I feel what is expected of me by the industry. WE need all of those other aspects in order for it to be a worthwhile product to want to Consume!

P.S If you don't agree with my selection well that's tough titty and you should have messaged me to make more suggestions!

Dem chunes!

Heyo!

Been a long ass time so let's get our jig on!

I really enjoy the Mass Effect 3 soundtrack probably more than I should. So much emotional investment in that game and they upset a lot of people but the music from that game is AMAZING! I can't listen to End Once and For All without bubbling up and urging the imaginary Normandy SR-2 to make it past that shock wave! I personally think it's the Best Music Score for a Game (so far) ever! 

Despite my bias I asked some fellow Gamers what they thought was the Best Musical Score for a Game and they gave me a list:

Quake 2
Streets of Rage 2
Kingdom Hearts
Halo
Quake
All Final Fantasy Final Boss Themes (not really a soundtrack but included all the same)
Megaman X

*So Far Streets of Rage 2 is Winning!*** 

It's got Heart and Soul and some Serious Jams man! 
I'm going to listen to them all and compile a top 5. If you have any suggestions please feel free to comment or send me a message!

Check oot the Faceybook

Stuff I hear when I'm here

Sometimes you don't often hear the words of other people's conversations as you approach them, missing the context completely. I put it down to me being partiality deef.

Here are some of the things I (think I) hear between two cities:

Female on Phone- 'That's all the balls I can handle'

Young girl to mother- 'your fat coz you ate the baby'

Young Male 1- 'I'll just walk back in and they'll never know I was gone'
Young Male 2- 'What about the house alarm?'
YM1 'I'll just say it was a robber n' I scared 'im off when I came in'

Young Female 1- 'I was watching this thing the other day and the girl went in the bath to shave her legs then went to shave her bits and just wiggled it about!'
YF2- 'wiggled what about?!'
YF1- 'her bits'
YF3-' eh? It's not detachable!'

(Group of young people watching a music video in a café)
Male 1- 'Urgh what is that music doing?!'
Female 1- 'using images of old people to show what they are singing about'
Male 1-' no! It's emotional blackmail, I don't want to feel sad today!'

YF1-' well her Dad is a car fanatic, he has 3 of the same car!'
YF2- 'oh cool so could she drive us then?'
YF1- 'What? They're not for driving!'

M1- ' I really hate having a poo in there'
M2- 'oh? Just flush and push, that's what I do'

Older Gentleman- 'Blast this Sunshine! You'll have to operate to get me out of this coat!'

YM 1- 'my house flooded in *----*'
YM 2- 'oh no, what are you going to do?'
YM 1-'Going to live in the other one in *---* it's such an inconvenience!'

'So you'll have to carry all that yourself?'
'Hey that's what boobs are for!'

'The library is not for casual reading'

'I have been pleasantly ventilated'

I'm a silent worker so I find most people don't realise I'm there and have very private conversations. I'm not gonna note them down but it makes me more aware of what information we reveal about ourselves when we think no one is listening.

*N.B this has been compiled over a few months and I have omitted names and places to protect the identities of my fellow human beings in the practice of social interaction. Some as my intro suggests I have completely misheard. Or made up ;) *